This morning I got a call from my home in India. My dearest grand dad passed away. It hurt so much to learn that. He has been sick from some time and I made it a point to spend a lot of time with him on my trip to India last month. It’s been a weird day. I tried so many ways to find solace in many things. It’s hard. Death is such a full stop to everything that happens around it that it throws people off their rhythm.

My grand father was the sweetest person in the world. The only person who would let me do and let me have whatever I want while growing up under my strict dad. I don’t remember when it started to happen but I think around the age when I was 7 I started to go spend all my summer at my grand parents place. It was so much fun. I used to look forward to that. The summer was the best. I would just spend time with my friends and watch movies. My grand parents took care of me.

Then later when I was went to college, it so happened that it was like 20 miles from my grand parents place. I loved it. Every weekend I would go visit them and spend a good amount of time. My grand father was so much fun to hangout with. He was a farmer. I would go to fields with him and watch him do the work and try to help. He loved farming. He has un-usual way to telling weather. Just by smelling the air and looking at the sky he could tell if it’s going to rain or not. It was fascinating to me.

It was always sad to leave their place to go back to my place. But one thing that got etched into my memory when I was kid was – as I was saying good bye to him – my grand father started to cry. I could never imagine that he could cry and I was shocked. I still remember that day.

10 years ago he had a stroke and everyone thought we would lose him. But he came back like a rock star. He got healed and miraculously also managed to do his pilgrimage and live this long. He was 80+ and in a good health. He doesn’t have any of the modern lifestyle diseases, no eye sight and still was going around on his bi-cycle.

I love him so much and I am going to miss him a lot. My only solace is that I saw him last month and he saw Sahana and was able to bless her. It’s painful to digest this and there are no words sometimes to express it. One song keep going on in my head and I just keep listening to it. It somehow soothes me.

Rest in Peace Nana. I will miss you a lot.